redwing_badger: (Kronner: Stuffing goes WHERE?)
So, I get to work tonight.

I open my laptop bag.

A ferret pops out to say "OMG HAI!"

I am all 8O "ZATA, WTF ARE YOU DOIN THAR?!"

He is all :D "HAI!"

I am all "Oh shit. Ferret at work. WTF do I do with a ferret at a hotel. WTF DO I DO?"

Zata: :D

Badger: >:\

Zata: :D

Badger: >:\

Zata: :D "...?"

Badger: >:\ "Srsly. WTF do I do with you?"

Zata: "IDK BUT I'MMA GO IN UR POCKET :D" *goes into pocket.*

Badger: :| *resigned* "Fine, I will just close you in the office if I leave... Except it is NOT FERRETPROOFED IN HERE. Ahh, wires! Holes! Little spaces for him to squeeze into!"

So he's in my pocket right now. I'm going to go to the truck in a minute and see if I have a spare crate or carrier in there. I'm sure I do, I usually have something.

EDIT: Huzzah, I had a kitty crate in there! So there's something, anyway. I can contain him, if needed. Argh, I just want to know how he got in there. Jager must've had them out of their room. *sigh*
redwing_badger: (Homer/Nick: Love hurts)
Getting the injured guys back? Is going to mean exactly squat. They're still going to play like shit. We've had (and still have) most of our "star" players. They have not been playing like stars.

Datsyuk, you are not living up to your hype, and should not be on the first line. Period. I don't care how much you "need someone who understands you". If you cannot produce on a line with fucking HENRIK ZETTERBERG, your very own Eurotwin... well, I think that says it all.

Our coach? Is not coaching like he should be. You can't roll the same lines every night and expect miracles. You cannot have zero goalie rotation, burning one guy out and leaving one to rust, and expect miracles. You cannot decide to stick a guy on a different line for one fucking period, and expect miracles.

This team? Has fractured in some weird way. I remember when we lost in game seven, everyone was all "Oh yeah, they'll come back, this will light a fire under their asses!" I thought that would happen too. So why the fuck hasn't it?

Why have we gone from 2008 Stanley Cup champions and the best, most cohesive team in hockey, to sucking ass in 08-09, but still, somehow, making it to the Stanley Cup Final, to losing the Stanley Cup, AT HOME, after seven games, to suffering a rash of injuries and still playing pretty well throughout that, to... continuing to suck ass again. I mean, we are barely clinging to the last playoff spot in our conference.

WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED?

That is seriously all I want to know. The Red Wings can go back to being the Dead Things for all I care; I'll still support them, and proudly. I just want to know what the fuck happened to this team.

Oh, and on a half assed related note, remember how I was all "Yay, my pictures are backed up on my external drive!"? Yeah, well, that's gone and died too. It's all beepy-clicky, which is pretty much the death gasps of an external drive. I've only used the thing maybe a dozen times. So off I go to the computer place, to see if they can restore my shit. AGAIN.

Why doesn't this shit happen to anyone else?
redwing_badger: (Badger: Pride)
Photobucket

There is a line between slash and fetishization, and that line gets dangerously close to being crossed 96% of the time.

I enjoy slash, obviously, I mean, I write it, but sometimes it's more a matter of "Guys fucking = hot" then it is a matter of "Guys fucking = hot, but there's more to a character than who he sleeps with." I don't mind PWP, but it doesn't *always* need to be about the sex. Sometimes you can have actual plot without gratuitous porning. You don't see a whole lot of slash fics that are just you know, little snapshots in time, two (or three, or more) men just being together, as a couple. A lot of it is fucking, which is all well and good in it's place, but it seems that lately, all the slashfic I read is either about the sex, or is leading up to sex.

If I'm going to read any kind of relationship fic, regardless of the genders of the characters involved, I want it to be believable. People interacting as people, not just as cut and paste sex objects. If two guys are going at it, make it about them, not the sex. I don't want to read fic where you can snip one guy out and put anyone else in there and have it read the same way. That just doesn't work. If it's a grudgefuck, fine, show me inside their heads and make me get why they're grudgefucking. Same thing for if they're suddenly in love forever, or anything else. I can understand a snippet of a pairing, just a one shot, with other similar fics being worked on. That's cool, I'm currently doing that with Holmstrom/Turco.

I also take umbrage at straight women telling me what I can and cannot do in bed. Not all gay men have anal sex. Sometimes we just tangle together and jerk off. Sometimes, we switch in between. Sometimes, we have terrible sex. We can have sex in missionary. Sometimes, we don't want to have sex, but we do it anyway because our partner wants it. Depending on your level of experience, you might opt to not use lube. If you've had anal sex several times, you probably don't need an intense amount of prepreparation. It all depends on the mood, and how you feel at the time. We don't always have sex in bed. We are just as fluid as anyone else is, when it comes to fucking.

And you know, we're not woobies. We don't need another person to depend on all the time. We can take care of ourselves, without a boyfriend there to hold us. Support is fine, codependance is not. Being gay does not make you incapable of being self-sufficient. A lot of us have no choice *but* to be self-sufficient, and usually from a young age. It comes part and parcel with being queer.

The trend, too, of essentially making one of the slash pair the "woman" is irritating and offensive on so many levels, and not a little misogynistic either. Not only do most straight relationships not work like that, gay ones don't either. BECAUSE HELLO THEY ARE BOTH MEN. The dynamic is gonna be different, because the combination of genders is. It's like writers just take the general conception of a hetero relationship and slot two men into those same roles. We are men, and, while there is nothing wrong with being a woman, at all, most men are not going to act like a man and woman would. The genders are different, the societal expectations of those genders are different, and the way two people of opposite genders relate to one another is generally not going to be the same way two people of the same gender will relate to one another. Isn't the typical "nuclear" hetero relationship just a Hollywood concept anyway? In my experience, Hollywood is not really a great basis for forming relationships in the first place.

How about we try to write our characters as functioning, capable adults, equal partners in the relationship, and not horrifically offensive stereotypes? I'm not trying to be the Ambassador of gay men here, I'm just trying to point out that, as a gay man, and having spoken to other gay men about this same thing, I think I have a little more basis to preach about this sort of things than the majority of the writers of slashfic out there.

...

Dec. 3rd, 2009 11:25 am
redwing_badger: (Badger: Jesus *facepalm*)
I just had to disassemble a pen to pick the lock on the bathroom door, thus releasing my boyfriend.

Yes, Jager locked himself into the bathroom.

Round of applause please, this is the man who is serving and protecting us. THEY GAVE HIM A GUN AND HE CANNOT EVEN WORK A DOORKNOB.

Oh great...

Dec. 1st, 2009 06:54 am
redwing_badger: (Disney: Kuzco: LLAMA FACE!)
My dog just yakked all over my pants.

Seriously, Sub-Zero, you could not have WAITED SIX MINUTES UNTIL WE WERE AT LEAST OUTSIDE?

Gah, I hope no one else comes to check out. I cannot possibly be expected to remain professional with dog vomit dripping down my leg, now can I?

*attempts to sponge it off with a tissue* Fuck fuck fuck and I can't make a break to the bathroom because there are people EATING IN MY LOBBY!

ARGLEBLARGLERAGGLEFRAGGLEARGH! ಥ_ಥ

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